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Thread: [Req] The Best Charlie Haughey Quotes (behind closed doors)

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    Default [Req] The Best Charlie Haughey Quotes (behind closed doors)

    Hi All,

    This thread is running simultaneously in the politics forum of boards.ie and the history forum of politics.ie (see other at http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthre ... st53255580 )

    One of the things that I find most interesting about Haughey are some the brilliant quotes he came out with when he was behind closed doors.

    Here’s what I’ve come across to date. If anyone has any others, feel free to share.
    (please reference where you got the quote from)

    1.CJH went to President Erskine Childers funeral “to make sure the f***er was planted”

    2.When an interview conducted by a young female journalist concluded, CJH said “I suppose a ride is out of the question!”. He then felt her up as she walked off.
    (Proposition was only a joke as there was a young male photographer present.)

    3.While passing a crowd of female sailors on his boat “Celtic Mist”, he shouted out “Are ye’r knickers wet?”


    4.CJH talking, in the privacy of this office, to his Press Secretary, Frank Dunlop

    CJH: “Where the f*** were you yesterday?”

    FD: “Yesterday – Sunday – I was at home in the bosom of my family”

    CJH: “We’re making some progress – the f***er knows yesterday was Sunday”.

    5.CJH supporter Don Lydon, after being grilled by CJH, was having trouble finding the door out of CJHs wood panelled office. After a few moments, CJH looks up

    CJH: “What are you still doing here?”

    DL: “I can’t find the door, Taoiseach”

    CJH: “Then why don’t you jump out the f***ing window?”

    6.CJH’s reaction on reading a Private Eye magazine article linking CJH with the “aging” Terry Keane, in Frank Dunlops presence.

    “Jasus, Frank, she’ll go f***in’ banana’s when she reads this”

    References

    1 Yes Taoiseach, Frank Dunlop, 2005 p ?
    2 Haughey’s 40 Years of Controversy, T Ryle Dwyer, 2005 p225
    3 Haughey’s 40 Years of Controversy, T Ryle Dwyer, 2005 p225
    4 Haughey’s 40 Years of Controversy, T Ryle Dwyer, 2005 p89 (Also in Yes Taoiseach)
    5 People Politics and Power, Stephen Collins, p179
    6 Haughey’s 40 Years of Controversy, T Ryle Dwyer, 2005 p224 (Also in Yes Taoiseach)

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    Default Re: [Req] The Best Charlie Haughey Quotes (behind closed doo

    Quote Originally Posted by DavidDoyle
    4.CJH talking, in the privacy of this office, to his Press Secretary, Frank Dunlop

    CJH: “Where the f*** were you yesterday?”

    FD: “Yesterday – Sunday – I was at home in the bosom of my family”

    CJH: “We’re making some progress – the f***er knows yesterday was Sunday”.

    ........

    5.CJH supporter Don Lydon, after being grilled by CJH, was having trouble finding the door out of CJHs wood panelled office. After a few moments, CJH looks up

    CJH: “What are you still doing here?”

    DL: “I can’t find the door, Taoiseach”

    CJH: “Then why don’t you jump out the f***ing window?”
    Two absolute classics!
    Economic Left/Right: -2.00
    Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -2.88

    Some people see things as they are and ask why? I dream things that never were and ask why not?
    G.B Shaw

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    Someone or other collected a book of quotes called 'Talk Nation'. There's some good CJH quotes in there. I can paraphrase a couple: "Deep down I'm quite shallow" and "Who writes the editorials in the Irish Times? They sound like they were written by an old woman in a bath, with the water going cold around her fanny". That's how I always pictured Conor Brady.

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    Or when his boat sank and he was asked what happened: "I walked on water". This may not have been behind closed doors though.
    The political establishment lacks both vision and courage.

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    Thanks for all quotes so far. This one was PMed to me.

    Liam Lalor used to always meet with the same Iraqi official when on business between Ireland and Iraq. One year Lalor went over and there was a new Iraqi Official. Lalor asked what happened to the old official and he was told that Sadam had him executed. Lalor told that to Haughey. CJ replied:
    "By God Lalor, that's what I call a cabinet re-shuffle".

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    My favourite was when he was at an Irish trade show back in the 60's somewhere in the States and Ben Dunne Snr had as part of his display a collection of brush nylon shirts (I wore one as a boy - horrible things) and Charlie demanded that he hide them away, shouting "This isn't the ******************************ing Dandelion Market".

    Apparently Margaret Heffernan held a grudge against CJH for this humiliation of her father and this is reputed to be one of the reasons she went after him bald-headed at the time of the Ben Jnr controversy.
    Political language. . . is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind.
    George Orwell

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    Oh great. A collection of the abusive utterances of a megalomaniacal pr1ck.
    Redacted.

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    I heard one story that CJH was meeting the boys and girls of the U2 pop group and Bono was looking rather sullen as he was not fond of CJHs policies at the time. Anyway Haughey asked the lads if they knew someone whos name I can't remember and when they said they didn't he leaned in and whispered "Good he'd drink you's under the ************************************g table" the lads burst there hole laughing and a photo was taken making them all look like the best of buddies.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 905
    Someone or other collected a book of quotes called 'Talk Nation'. There's some good CJH quotes in there. I can paraphrase a couple: "Deep down I'm quite shallow" and "Who writes the editorials in the Irish Times? They sound like they were written by an old woman in a bath, with the water going cold around her fanny". That's how I always pictured Conor Brady.
    Haughey may haqve said this, but it waqs originally said by Seán Lemass
    John Gormley. The lights may be on, but there's no one at home....

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    One time a well known female RTE journalist was interviewing him about the EU. She said to him: 'Yes, Taoiseach, I suppose it is important to have a level playing field...'.
    Haughey smirked for a minute, looked over her head and said 'It's even more important to have a level ball ...'. Yer woman was so entranced by him that she didn't even notice what he'd said.
    John Gormley. The lights may be on, but there's no one at home....

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