A Priest And A Pastor

[Seabird]

A priest and a pastor from the local churches are standing by the side of the road, pounding a sign into the ground, that reads:



The End is Near!

Turn Yourself Around Now

Before it's Too Late!



As a car sped past them, the driver yelled, "Leave us alone, you religious
nuts!" From the curve they heard screeching tires and a big splash.
The priest turns to the pastor and asks, "Do you think the sign should just say 'Bridge Out'?"

[JCSkinner]

Big Ian, the Dalai Lama and the Pope are having a row over whose is the true religion. They decide to test their faith to decide which is right.
On a given day, they gather on the North Antrim coast, where each will attempt to walk across the waters to Scotland in order to demonstrate the veracity of their beliefs.
Ratsi goes first, after a slowly spoken speech about the one true mother church and the lineage of St Peter. He takes a tentative step onto the waves, then a second, and before you know it, he's a blur in white jogging across the Irish sea quicksmart.
Dalai Lama gets up next, reminds the gathered crowds that this reality is a dream, that possessions are encumbrances and invites everyone to imagine the sound of one hand clapping. He dips a toes in the direction of the freezing waters, places his foot firmly on the waves, and before you know it, he's a saffron blur jogging across the Sea towards Scotland.
Big Ian gets up and makes a blood and thunder speech to what is effectively a home audience. He fulminates against pagan creeds, but especially against the great Satan and Babylon, the Roman Catholic church.
He bellows at everyone how he has been true to the simple fundamentalist faith of his forefathers, a faith based on strict interpretation of the bible alone, and surely the only true faith worth following.
He then takes a single huge stride off Ballycastle pier and sinks to the bottom instantly.
"I told you we should have told him about the stepping stones", the Dalai Lama says to Ratsi.


(I'll get me coat.)

[Seabird]

JC,

Good One!!

[Libero]

I wonder if Papa Ratzi is still haunted in his dreams by the sight of Big Ian's child-like eyes and look of terror as he went to his fate, a fate that today's Pope was happly to collude in...
[size=7]apologies to the great Doctor T04 PhD[/size]

[rockofcashel]

In fairness, that was a crap joke