God Accused of "Thinking He's Bono"

[Casualbets]

The Musical and Religious worlds were thrown into turmoil last night by God's sudden and unprovoked comment that he was quite possibly "nearly as well-known as Bono, though of course not nearly as popular"

The media storm ever since has been unprecedented in its scope and vitriol, with even some of God's staunchest backers distancing themselves - Cardinal Sean Brady commented :"Normally I'm four square behind the big man, but jesus, he's really put his foot in it this time - however with adequate penance I think he can come through this".

The vast majority of the criticism was an unequivocally negative nature however - Billy Nomates of the U2 Perpetual Adoration Society said :"Who the feck does God think he is? Okay so he created the world in seven days but that's small piss compared to the magnitude and glory of Bono's accomplishments - I mean do you think the most exalted one wears shades 24/7 as some form of post-post-ironic comment on modern stereotypes of image or to distract attention away from his receding hairline? No it is to stop himself being blinded by his own brilliance. So There."

Pope Benedic move to shore up God's position by issuing a statement to say that he had "full confidence - for the moment - in God's ability to continue and prosper in his current role" though reports that he has appointed John Delaney as an advisor may mean that this assurance isn't necessarily set in stone. Further doubt on God's future has been created by the refusal of Dana's spokesman to confirm or deny that she was interested in the post if it became available.

Bono himself was not available for comment as he was in Africa saving the continent whilst also looking for some suitably flexible U2-Friendly tax regimes...

[stannis]

I'm sure Bono will find it in his infinite mercy to forgive God. Bono moves in 'Mysterious Ways'!