Originally Posted by sadmal

I think in the past few years funerals have chnged in Dublin and surrounding counties. The removal ie, bring the body to the church the night before the funeral is disappearing. The body is now being brought to the home and then directly to the church in the morning for the funeral.

Some funeral directors have claimed that this is for financial reasons but I think its to make the funeral more personal. Instead of two very public occasions we have just one. This gives the family time and space to say their goodbyes in a private and personal way.

I think it's also families deciding that they don't want the deceased to be all by themselves in a big, cold church, the night before the funeral.

Originally Posted by Sister Mercedes

I think it's also families deciding that they don't want the deceased to be all by themselves in a big, cold church, the night before the funeral.

Yes, there is a definite comfort factor. Getting people over the shock of a death through stages. Can maybe go other way too! When my mother died I remember being in midst of heated argument over the Dubs when little one - then 10 - tugged at me to follow her. Went outside and she asked me "Dad, why are people having a party because Granny died?". Didn't know whether to laugh or cry but Granny would have been on her side!

Originally Posted by walrusgumble

Bit like the ones who, when they get a hold of a newspaper, immeditately go to look at the death notices.

I have an uncle, though very well known, always seems to be forever going to funerals / wakes / anniversary masses of his friends or family etc. More out of respect of course


Don't forget, the obligatory presence of the local TD, and the mutterings of the public when they see him / her. Kiss his/her arse and once gone laugh off that X hated that TD

Reminds me of when Willie O'Dea was sacked as Minister and the locals were asked for their reaction. They were all very disappointed of course - then the interviewer asked what he had done as Minister for the people of Limerick - one man searched his brain for something positive then said "He went to lots of funerals"

Originally Posted by sadmal

I think in the past few years funerals have chnged in Dublin and surrounding counties. The removal ie, bring the body to the church the night before the funeral is disappearing. The body is now being brought to the home and then directly to the church in the morning for the funeral.

Some funeral directors have claimed that this is for financial reasons but I think its to make the funeral more personal. Instead of two very public occasions we have just one. This gives the family time and space to say their goodbyes in a private and personal way.

I would agree fully with this.

Those who cannot make the funeral can visit the house and pay respects ( where there is no evening removal).

All in all, whether the deceased reposes at home or at a funeral home, the evening removal seems to be dying out, no pun intended!

And I agree about leaving a loved one alone in a cold deserted church overnight. Maybe I'm a pussycat, but that does not sit right with me.

Originally Posted by MaireadKelly1

Agree that all deaths are not equal.

My brother died by suicide at the age of 26. There was total devastation all round. The whole village
came to the house to sympathise. My poor mother's right hand was black from all the people shaking it.
At no stage during the few days of the wake and funeral do I remember anyone laughing. We were like
zombies just going through the motions.

When my broken-hearted father died twelve weeks later, it was all so different. He had suffered a massive
heart attack ten days prior to his passing, so we were psychologically prepared for the fact that he was
going to die. At his funeral there was much laughter and joking among all the relatives whom we had hardly
noticed at my brother's a few weeks earlier. Of course we missed my father, but he had lived a good life and
his leaving us seemed in accordance with the natural order of things.

B in Laws brother committed suicide and what really messed him up was the actions of the heros in the balaclavas related to a political party in the Dail who held a gun to his head when robbing the payroll where he worked, changed a happy go lucky guy to someone who thought they were coming back for him.

Funeral was a sad one with a lot of grief as he was so young, almost 30 years later it still sits hard in the hearts of the family.

Have known too many suicides and their funerals are endured not enjoyed as its a feeling of a future lost rather than a past remembered.

Originally Posted by sadmal

Reminds me of when Willie O'Dea was sacked as Minister and the locals were asked for their reaction. They were all very disappointed of course - then the interviewer asked what he had done as Minister for the people of Limerick - one man searched his brain for something positive then said "He went to lots of funerals"

When my grand-mother (who knew the Rat) passed away, the Rat stood outside the Church while the funeral was on. To be seen standing outside the Church.

Never offered his condolensces

Originally Posted by odie1kanobe

B in Laws brother committed suicide and what really messed him up was the actions of the heros in the balaclavas related to a political party in the Dail who held a gun to his head when robbing the payroll where he worked, changed a happy go lucky guy to someone who thought they were coming back for him.

Funeral was a sad one with a lot of grief as he was so young, almost 30 years later it still sits hard in the hearts of the family.

Have known too many suicides and their funerals are endured not enjoyed as its a feeling of a future lost rather than a past remembered.

That struck a chord.

So sad. Thanks for posting.

Originally Posted by amsterdemmetje

Why would you think i never heard the word Langer before? Have you never got langered Drunk?

We were driving from The Big Ssmoke, so it was bound to be late .i was never at an on time funeral in my life.
When its a funeral mass people normally wait in the pub or on the street ,where i come from anyways.

I didn't say you hadn't. In your post it was the first time I had seen it. I had to google it to find out what it meant!

Originally Posted by gracethepirate

I didn't say you hadn't. In your post it was the first time I had seen it. I had to google it to find out what it meant!

Ah fair enough ,sorry for the mix up, i think langer can be used any way ya want it .

Originally Posted by gerhard dengler

I guess I've got to the stage of my life where my parents discuss with me what way they want to depart.
It sounds morbid especially so as my folks enjoy relatively good health for their age ! (thank God).

My mother has even planned the music that she wants to have played at her funeral (Dublin City in the Rare Aul Times!).

I was a bit freaked out when they first brought the subject up for discussion. No one wants to consider the mortality of the people who brought you in to the world after all.
But as they told me, death is a natural conclusion. Both of my folks are practising Roman Catholics and I am very reassured at their positive attitude. I think a combination of their age and religious faith account for their point of view.

I should add that this isn't the topic of conversation every time I call to see mam and dad

My neighbour and his wife were great Elvis fans and when he knew he was dying requested Are You Lonesome tonght to be played at his funeral. The priest refused to allow it because it was not a sacred hymn and also because of the title so his family had it played at the end of the funeral Mass with only the family present! We all had to wait outside! Still - he got his wish - his ashes now sit on top of the cocktail cabinet!